Saturday, August 30, 2008

The Promise of a New Day

Even though I haven't been true to my readers by randomly leaving, I will attempt to write this quick update. I am currently single not fully by choice, but because it was something that had to be done.

It started as a simple misunderstanding which turned into something more than what it shoulduve been. I will spare the details, but my relationship had always been rocky and on ice as we had communication problems. Also, there was underlying istrust or rather over-controlling ways on his part to me. Maybe it was the fact that this person didn't want me to leave them or rather never wanted to be alone. However, a conversation to explain the wrong-doings turned into something physical as he snapped and hit me in my face/head a couple times. Now I ain't no punk and was ready to kill and fight back, but I couldn't hit someone I cared about. Also, this person just got out of the hospital. Something had just restrained me from swinging back and I am not sure why my reaction was mixed. I had so much anger, shocked, hurt, and just flat out surprised. Is this what we had become? So much built up anger or emotion that just got unleashed at that moment? Thing about that is that they were in the hospital and I was there all that time and everyday and night for weeks and this was how I got repaid. However, I digress from it all and currently trying to move on.

So that is where I currently am. I am getting back to focusing on me and solely me which has not been easy as of lately. So much has been on my mind and the person that I use to lean on and at least talk to in the few instances that I did is not there to talk to anymore and it is by choice. I know that I cannot go backwards and need to move fowards. I have so much going for me to waste time on something like that. My current plans is to actually move pretty soon and relocate at the top of 2009. Now that I have shared this blog post with many, I feel this is the start of a "New Day".