New Year New Situations

So wow, I haven't updated since last year and thought I should stay in touch at least. I just got a raise at my job and in this economy.....that is a blessing. "My President is Black" is another thing that has happened since last year and whether that is a good thing or bad thing remains to be seen. However, perhaps any type of change will be better than what we currently have going on.

I currently have been dating someone new and that has been going well, really well. This person keeps me going, positive, and motivated. We have our ups and downs, but that is normal. I really appreciate this person and gives me hope that 2009 will be a good year despite its start.

On another note, I guess all the stress of 2008 and even the past caught up to me for I had been diagnosed with being diabetic. I had symptoms of being tired, thirsty, and having to piss every 45 minutes. Well after going to the doctor, my sugar level was in coma range and I coulduve been on the floor somewhere instantly. So now I have a needle that I have to use daily. Not how I imagined 2009 to start, but I have been learning to deal. So I was already exercising daily, but I have to change eating habits as far as eliminating certain things from what I eat. Not only did they find that they also found out that I have high blood pressure. Not only that, they found out that I have some sort of thyroid something which can lead to weight gain and other nervious system issues if not caught early. I have always been exercising and have not gained anything but just being tired, exhausted after work, easily frustrated or irritated has been what I experienced. Nonetheless, it was like one thing after another and it so weird cause it all came out of the blue. I had been to the doctor many times previous, and blood pressure was in check, sugar levels were normal, and everything. Seem like it all got shot 2 weeks ago. 

Emotionally, I have been up and down cause there are so many things I have to do now to make sure that I am in check. The thing that keeps me going is that I have a small circle of people that keep me going everyday. Even though most are scattered through the world right now, I have at least my dude that I am with that keeps me motivated and going daily. I have now my moms, even as mixed up as she can be at times staying on me to make sure I am okay. I also have my roommate as well making sure things are cool. In one doctor visit it was hard for me to swallow all the news at one time. 

I just am glad to be alive another year at least to be able to see another day. I try to appreciate every day as it comes and I appreciate the people that have come into my life in a positive way. I feel this year will be full of changes and surprises as they have already come to me. But I am ready to deal with them as they come to become that better and stronger me in 2009.

When It Rains It Pours.....

The saying when it rains it pours comes to mind. Why? Cause just when you think things cannot get worse, they do !

So I have been M.I.A. on blogger, but I have to check in every now and again. So as of 9-16-08, I had become the proud owner of a new Honda Accord 08 as a birthday gift to me. However, this past weekend an animal ran into my car(yes and animal and yes it ran into me). Therefore, it broke the bumper in two and part of the bumper is hanging off the car.

Okay, so did the animal live? Yes, whatever it was walked away. Were you hurt? No I was not hurt, but my feelings were. Oh boy, I was so upset it was crazy ! So lets overview the chain of events leading up to this event.

Had a week at work. I work in IT and had the pager which went off several times in the middle of the night. Fine, Friday came and I planned on enjoying the weekend, but had a severe headache which kept me in my bed. Saturday, I thought I would fight the headache and leave the house when WHAM ! Animal.......bumper.....car.....yeah basically. Which leads me back to today. So in this economy, you cant afford to have insurance going up on a brotha. Sunday was chill and then here comes Monday.

Monday become the mission to figure out how Malachi was going to get fixed(yeah I named my car and what?). I went to a couple body shops and the dealership. They gave me basically an estimate of 1000 dollars when it was all said and done. OH SHIT! I was very upset at this point. I called the insurance filed the claim after running around all day and just decided to take car of business. Have no choice but to suck it up right?

Well, I planned on going home for Thanksgiving, but this incident puts a real damper on my plans. Then on top of that, I planned on doing something special for someone, but that did not fall through at all. Money became a major issue and I am still trying to figure it all out as we speak on how to still make things happen.

When it rains it pours. But when there is a storm, there is surely a rainbow to follow......right?

The After Party

My birthday was yesterday and I am now 27! I don't feel old, but man 27 years. I never thought that I would get to this point. It seem only yesterday I was in high school in the lunch room trying to figure out when I was going to get my diploma. Only yesterday when I was wondering during registration at an HBCU, when I was going to ever get my degree. Only yesterday when I wondering when I would move into my own place and do my own thing. Man I wish I could relive some of those days.

But I can actually say my birthday was great. Even though I did go ahead and go to work and my birthday landed on a Monday......it was cool. Many friends called me and wished me a happy birthday along with people I hadn't talked to in a long time. It was a good day. The people that mattered were the people I talked to.

At work, they got me a card and embarrassed me by singing happy birthday to me which was crazy. Well, I am going to keep this post short.

So I guess for this weekend, maybe I am going to treat myself by going out or something perhaps? Haven't done so in ages..........but just something to celebrate my happiness.

In the Middle of the Night......

In the middle of the night, I have awakened and decided to write in my blog. Really what's on my mind ? Nothing really.......

Well.....

People come into your life for a reason right? Whether it is for a long while, a week, a day, or just a change of the season......people come and go. It is true though and I am really getting to understand that life always comes with many lessons that are learned. I see that I have more control over what I decide to tolerate and decide not to tolerate. Random as it seems, being single for a couple weeks now has been rough, but an interesting experience. Every now and then I get in the slump of "damn I'm single now....what do I do?" Then, I also realize it gives me time and space for me to think, reflect, and grow.

That's all folks. I just wanted to share just that. I think I am going to lay it down. Good night !

Month of the Virgo

September, the month of the Virgo. I will be celebrating my birthday September 15th. What does that mean? Probably just another day in which I realize that I am getting older. Do I think that I seen everything and experienced life to the fullest yet? Nope, not even the least bit.

I can say that this year has truly tested me in more ways than one. How it will end, I have no clue. All, I know is that right now I am going through an emotional time in my life where I feel I don't have anyone. I think I have exhausted the use of my friends in a recent situation I had been dealing with that I feel bad even talking to them at times just because.....yup just because. It is about getting to know me again and getting back to focusing on the goals that I had setup for myself. I am so afraid because I was on a journey with someone to live life and achieve goals, yet recently I had to drop them off to go back on my journey alone after years of knowing this person.

I ain't gonna lie to y'all, I still hurt and still cry. But the funny thing is that I been hurt by so many things in the past before that lately when I cry no tears come out. Call it dry eyes, I don't know, but right now I am thinking hard about everything and just feeling so much different shit right now. I know I should be sleep right now for I have to go to work in the morning, but I'd just thought I'd share my current feelings. I need to remember this is my month though. I need to enjoy it. Maybe, I will plan a trip or go somewhere as a present to me. What do you all think I should do?

The Promise of a New Day

Even though I haven't been true to my readers by randomly leaving, I will attempt to write this quick update. I am currently single not fully by choice, but because it was something that had to be done.

It started as a simple misunderstanding which turned into something more than what it shoulduve been. I will spare the details, but my relationship had always been rocky and on ice as we had communication problems. Also, there was underlying istrust or rather over-controlling ways on his part to me. Maybe it was the fact that this person didn't want me to leave them or rather never wanted to be alone. However, a conversation to explain the wrong-doings turned into something physical as he snapped and hit me in my face/head a couple times. Now I ain't no punk and was ready to kill and fight back, but I couldn't hit someone I cared about. Also, this person just got out of the hospital. Something had just restrained me from swinging back and I am not sure why my reaction was mixed. I had so much anger, shocked, hurt, and just flat out surprised. Is this what we had become? So much built up anger or emotion that just got unleashed at that moment? Thing about that is that they were in the hospital and I was there all that time and everyday and night for weeks and this was how I got repaid. However, I digress from it all and currently trying to move on.

So that is where I currently am. I am getting back to focusing on me and solely me which has not been easy as of lately. So much has been on my mind and the person that I use to lean on and at least talk to in the few instances that I did is not there to talk to anymore and it is by choice. I know that I cannot go backwards and need to move fowards. I have so much going for me to waste time on something like that. My current plans is to actually move pretty soon and relocate at the top of 2009. Now that I have shared this blog post with many, I feel this is the start of a "New Day".

A New Season

Let me dust off the blog and try to get back to writing ..... not sure if anyone stays tuned anymore but here goes....

As summer approaches full force, the weather gets warm and occasional thunderstorms pass over again and again. However, storms don't last always. I believe there is always a rainbow awaiting to reveal itself after every passing storm. Things have gotten better from my previous blogs and many issues I noted. My relationship seems to be moreso on the positive side than negative lately. Communication has been taking place much more which has made things flow more easily.

As far as family, well still not dependable, but I must admit that I do miss them here and there. I finally was able to get a lead on my long lost brother and sisters. However, I have hesitated to make that phone call. Why? I don't know. What should I say? I mean the phone number is to my brothers daughter. Come to find out that the daughter resents his father which has the same name as I. Funny thing, I went to the same school at the same time with my niece even though she was 4 grades behind me, but never knew that. Amazing huh? Well, I tend to use the number one day to see where it leads me, but who knows.

I also bought a mountain bike. I figure gas is like 4 dollars a gallon, why not ride a bike? But yeah....so I took it on a trail the other day. It was crazy. I mean when I was much younger, I use to take leisure rides up and down the street, around the corner, down several blocks, and then back to the house. Never had I went on a true mountain bike trail. The shit was crazy though, but fun. It was a first for me.

Another thing I did for the first time was go kart riding. It was mad fun. It was a first of mines as well. It was with some people from work in which we raced around the track several times in a go kart and was knocking people out like Mario Kart.

I guess one thing that I would like to now is do some more travelling. Where do I want to go? I don't know.....FL? GA? CA? or maybe overseas? Well, I need to plan well in advance for it. Usually, every year I take a trip somewhere and this year I haven't really taken a vacation trip yet. Anyone got any ideas?